This blog post was written by my Mum, it is unedited and she has asked me to post it. The journey I am on is not just having an impact upon me but also on those I am closest to.
SHOCK! DISBELIEF! What are you supposed to think when your daughter tells you that she has breast cancer.
WHY? HOW? Why is it not me, or someone else who is older?
Is it my fault, I had the blueprint for Lorna or half of it anyway?
Is it nurture, even though Lorna has lived for longer as an independent adult than under my control/ direction? Maybe I will wake up and find it was just a nightmare?
Questions and more questions and no answers that made sense.
I think I was prepared for a small shock. But to hear MASTECTOMY, CHEMOTHERAPY, RADIOTHERAPY, what all of them! It really was a shock. But gradually, by going to appointments with Lorna and being able to ask questions of the consultants and specialist nurses and realise they had it all covered and also even telling other people and time passing, a certain acceptance crept in.
The stress of it all even caused tension between my husband and me, but a few vicious words and a vitriolic silence soon cleared the air.
Eventually we could look forward and think about the best we can do to support Lorna, and Craig too in whatever way they need. It might be going to an appointment, a pot of soup or stew, or maybe just a hug.
Then coughs and colds can intervene and for Lorna's sake you have to take a step back and stay away. Plans have to be fluid.
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